On International Women's Day, the patriarchy is alive and well!

Like many women today, I attended an International Women’s Day event.

​It was inspiring to have several women visibly stand up for themselves, recounting stories of overcoming adversity, trauma and seeking to inspire the next generation.

Far less visible were men in the audience. Less than a dozen in a room of hundreds of people!

​IWD events have increasingly become groups of women telling other women messages they are already familiar with because they live that reality.

For more progress to be made, men need to step up to the plate, hear about the realities of women’s exclusion and isolation in our society and do something different in daily life.

Why, as someone who works with women and mothers who struggle with anxiety, depression, trauma, burnout and who feel invisible and undervalued, do I care?
 
Because mental health does not happen in a vacuum. It is shaped by the patriarchal socio-cultural norms, rules, expectations and beliefs in which we live and into which we are socialised.

Because around 1 in 2 Australian women today are experiencing some level of mental health issues (Liptember Foundation 2023 Women’s mental health report).

Some very chilling context:

In the 2024 Man Box survey conducted by the Jesuit Social services,

28% of 18-30 year old men and 26% of 31-45 year old men believe that it is not good for a boy to be taught how to cook, sew, clean the house or take care of younger children

33% of 18-30 year old men and 28% of 31-45 year old men believe that a man shouldn’t have to do household chores.

42% of 18-30 year old men and 39% of 31-45 year old men believe that, in heterosexual relationships, men should really be the ones to bring money home to provide for their families, not women.

39% of 18-30 year old men and 40% of 31-45 year old men believe that, in heterosexual relationships, a man should always have the final say about decisions in his relationship or marriage.

35% of 18-30 year old men and 33% of 31-45 year old men believe that, if a guy has a girlfriend or wife, he deserves to know where she is all the time.

Right there, in those beliefs, attitudes and behaviours, the patriarchy is alive and well.

Right there is a key reason why women's and mothers' mental health is at crisis point.

Young men also struggle when upholding the ' "man box", a set of “rules” that represent a rigid, outdated and often harmful template for how a “real man” should think, feel, and behave' (Man Box report).

Those who uphold it are:

Over 7 times more likely to frequently experience thoughts of suicide.

6 times more likely to frequently experience thoughts of self-harm

Almost 6 times more likely to be problem gamblers

Almost twice as likely to drink frequently

1.5 times more likely to frequently experience feeling down, depressed, or hopeless

How much worse does it need to get before we all start caring?